Seaham Hall (September 22 1814)
‘It is indeed a pleasure to me to write when I need no longer measure, not my words, but my feelings…
Since I made myself yours, I have had a happiness, deep as it promises to be durable – not a moment of doubt.
Nothing but gratitude for all this – so unexpected, and which from some strange principle in human nature or in mine, I have sought to avert, and to bring despair on myself as well as you.
Had I known that you suffered, the baseless fabric would sooner have fallen…
I have been very foolish, and if you had not been wiser, we might both still have been without hope.
No, I remember too well what I last felt in your presence, under that coldness – my only resource and at the same time my vexation.
What I may seem to feel when we meet again I cannot guess – I could shrink from it too, yet let it be as soon as possible.‘
The Life and Letters of Anne Isabella Lady Noel Byron Ethel Colburn Mayne (London: Constable & Co Ltd 1929)